Drama used to follow me. It seemed as though most of my relationships sucked the life out of me.
It’s starts early in life – “he said she said this or that.”
Ugh, it’s just such a waste of time and energy!
I only have lived a drama free life in the last eight years. At one point, it was so overwhelming with my friendships and business that I just wanted to run away.
Do you ever feel that way – just run away from it all?
As I began to want to run, something inside of me said, “no wake up.”
The wake up call for me was figuring out that much of the drama in my life I was attracting to myself.
One of my greatness mentors, Brian Klemmer said, “every choice we make has a price and benefit.
So I asked myself, “what is the price and benefit for having drama filled relationships in my life?”
The price I was paying was time spent on the phone away from my family and hours of agony draining my energy to solve the problem and remain in good graces with everyone.
The benefit I was experiencing from drama was I had people’s attention – I was important in their lives which means I had value.
Where my life shifted was when I realized my value was not in what others thought but in my foundation, Jesus Christ. Obviously, needing to have this drama in my life, people were my foundation rather than my Heavenly Father.
I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant. Galations 1:10
If you can relate to having unwanted drama in your life, I would like to offer you some hope for ridding it out of your life.
D – DECIDE that God created your value not woman. Now, take an inventory of your relationships. Ask yourself, which ones are dragging me down and which ones are lifting me up?
R – RESERVE your time for those that lift you up. Create a couple of mentor relationships that will keep you accountable to create healthy boundaries and keep you from stepping back into unhealthy drama filled relationships.
A – ATTRACT authentic positive women in your life. A few years ago this was a goal of mine that I wrote down. When I look at my life today, this is all of my relationships now. Today I have very powerful confident women in my life that don’t compete with each other rather compliment. Oh such freedom!!
M – MAINTAIN healthy relationships by not including yourself as drama arises. If someone tells you a story – something you are not sure is true or not – don’t spread it. Don’t become that “one” that needs to feel important because you are sharing something others may not know thereby gaining attention. This is a dangerous place to sit and one that will come back to bite you. Believe me it’s tempting but a dangerously slippery slope.
A – ALLOW God to do a work in you as you grow closer and align your life with His. As I grew closer to God, those relationships drifted out of my life naturally. Also, be on guard or sensitive to drama filled women entering back into your life. You can easily fall back into that pattern if you aren’t staying conscious of it. I’ve seen this happen in my own life.
Now please understand that I’m not telling you to not extend love to those that need encouragement. What I am saying is have healthy boundaries established for yourself and with your mentor. This way you won’t fall prey to it again.
How has drama affected your life and how have you dealt with ridding it from your life? I would love to learn more from your experience. I’m still a work in progress.
@Michelle D. Howe